February 6, 2017
It’s a question that comes up surprisingly often – I’m an adult woman, and I sometimes feel like I’m too old to wear my birthstone…
Well, if you don’t tell anybody that you were born in February, or that amethysts are your birthstone, they won’t know the difference; they’ll just think that you like amethysts, or the color purple.
And if they do know that it’s your birthstone, and for some reason they think that it’s odd that you wear them… ignore them. Well, ignore this particular judgment, for a judgment is what it is. And not a kind one…
I was born in June. I wear pearls a LOT. Clearly, I don’t care if someone thinks I’m channeling my inner 3rd grader!
But frankly, it’s nobody’s business but yours, and you should feel free to embrace any ornament or color that pleases you. If you’re happy, that makes you a better friend, a kinder person, and a source of joy for those around you. That’s much more important than any mythical age-limit on what’s appropriate in the realm of gems and semi-precious stones…
Some of the other questions I’ve been asked were about wearing a particular stone with various colors, or with casual clothes. These are some of my ideas:
Purple and green are both secondary colors (that is, they are mixtures of red, yellow and/or blue, the primary colors), so they have a certain affinity. And I think amethysts with navy are glorious. Please note that if you’re actually going to go run/bike/play rugby, you might want to remove your bracelet. Okay, if you’re playing rugby, take off the earrings too! And send photos!!!
One little personal rule that I tried to observe pretty scrupulously was that warmer colors had jewelry set in gold, and cooler clothes had the cooler feeling metal of silver (or platinum, if you’re splashing out).
And you probably already know this, but if you’re looking for semi-precious stones set in silver, Novica is the best place in the world to find amazing things…
I tried REALLY hard to include a brown outfit. I spent a couple of hours looking around for nice shorts and a tee shirt in a pretty brown shade… and settled for barn red!
This is a good lesson though, because it’s a color that’s a long way from amethyst, but it still works when you include some other stones to bridge the color gap. Amethyst is often set with other stones and there are lovely color combinations around…
What if you want to wear amethysts for something dressy?
I suggest looking for a larger stone, if possible, in order to make a bit more of a color statement. During the day, a small stud earring is lovely, and all you need, but in the evening, or for a dressy event, something that shows up a bit more is worth considering.
And scarves can serve a million functions, including being the key that pulls all of your colors together! (plus they keep the air-conditioning off of your shoulders…)
Do remember that amethysts don’t have to be faceted – some of the polished ones are beautiful…
Yes, two of these dresses are the same color, but it’s SO unusual, and such a useful color for so many people who wear warmer shades, I couldn’t resist showing it twice. Eileen Fisher is always a good source to check for shades of brown and green; they seem to be important colors for her.
If you already have some amethyst birthstone jewelry (or just lovely treats!), it’s fun to bring another touch or two of purple into your outfit. Here are a few pretty pieces that I saw…. (OH, that handbag…)
I’m going to visit each months’ birthstone – I think it’s worth remembering that we have these kinds of accessory options available. Any chance I have to build an “accessory family” is a good work day for me!
love,
Janice
More from the Birthstone Series:
- January: Garnets
- February: Amethyst
- March: Aquamarines
- April: Diamonds
- May: Emeralds
- June: Pearls
- July: Carnelian
- August: Peridot
- September: Sapphires
- October: Opals
- November: Topaz or Citrine
- December: Turquoise or Tanzanite
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My birthstone is February, and I have quite a lot of real amethyst jewelry. It never once occurred to me that other people would think I was childish for wearing a purple jewel! Now I wonder if there's anything I'm missing about my other jewelry choices, or my clothing choices. I admit that I don't understand a lot of the unspoken rules that other people seem to take for granted, but this makes my hair stand on end.
Oh, Pleeeeeease. Don't let any Judgy McJudgypants suck the joy from your life. It took me a long time to learn that it's impossible to please everyone, so it's not even worth trying. Please yourself, the people who love you will be happy, too. That's all that matters.
I have never heard of it being childish to wear one's birth stone. Sounds like yet another restriction someone dreamed up to make everyone miserable. If you love it, wear it. You're being authentic to yourself, not to the other person's needs. I'm not so very considerate of others that I am not going to wear something I love.
Absolutely! if you like your birthstone and can afford some nice looking pieces … wear it! Judgy McJudgypants indeed!! Frankly, if you had not reminded me that June is pearls, i could not have told you.
I didn't know about the birthstone age limit either. In fact, I can't imagine giving jewelry with precious or semi-precious stones to children. Call me a cheapskate.
I have amethysts that I bought many years ago in Agra, India, carried around Asia in a hidden belt, then had set in silver when in Thailand. Earrings and a pendant necklace. I love them. Very, very simple. Plus I enjoy their provenance. But I rarely wear them because I've gravitated toward a bold red for accents. You have inspired me to get them out!
BTW, those Eileen Fisher dresses are marvels of elegance and simplicity.
My birthstone is turquoise and I never really liked it when I was young, but my family have been buying bracelets, earrings and necklaces for me over the years which I do wear stacked with my existing silver and white gold pieces, which I admit do look fresh in the summer months. I was aware that semi-precious gemstone pieces are used as an inexpensive way to introduce jewellery to young girls. Indeed, my own nan bought me my first piece when I was 16 which was a red garnet ring. Unfortunately, it didn't fit very well and I subsequently lost it some years later.
Sharon, U.K.
Amethyst is not my birthstone but I love it and all of the pretty purple accessories you shared today. Purple is one of my favorite colors and I wear it happily. :)
Love this post! Amethyst is my birthstone, and I love purple. Bought myself a huge amethyst cocktail ring set in silver and gold (goes with everything) for my 50th birthday, and it makes me feel like a princess every time I wear it. In fact, I think I'll wear it today!
I believe that is the purpose of jewelry. Anything that makes you feel as special as a princess is certainly worth wearing whenever you please. I take a lot of slack for wearing my "good" diamond stud earrings with my everyday blue jeans and a t-shirt. As Andrea said – I feel like a princess wearing them even while digging in the garden. Don't let anyone steal your joy. Only you know what makes you happy. (I'm also the kind of person who uses the "good" crystal water goblets with take-out pizza when the mood strikes.)
Love Feb babies like me and love amethysts and have lots xoxox
Janice,
Purple colors play a minor role in my wardrobe, but are a refreshing change when I'm in the mood for something less worn by me. I am thrilled to be informed that EF does brown ! Thanks for that info !
I'm excited for April; I find diamonds difficult to work with sometimes. Maybe it's because they cost a fortune to buy the real thing.. or that cubic zirconia can look very cheap. I anxiously await your thoughts! Thanks in advance.
I inherited some expensive jewelry with stones that are not my birthstone and can't wait to see how to integrate them into my wardrobe as an accessory family! BTW – I was never told that there was an age limit for wearing one's birthstone – I can't imagine why that would be. Thanks also for the Eileen Fisher tip!
LOVE semi-precious studs in the summer! It's too sticky for scarves, but a little sparkle on the ear is just the thing!
I have some quite wonderful amethyst gemstone jewelry, some inherited from a great-aunt who went crazy with what was once considered a relatively unimportant stone (and was therefore plentiful and inexpensive when she bought pieces back in the 30s and 40s). One is quite the rock which I don't wear as often as I should. One is a pale lavender gem I had unset from its impractical cocktail ring setting that I must get re-set. One is a pair of dark amethyst earrings from a wedding anniversary. I am tending toward the pure violet (flower) shade of purple these days. Would love to find a violet silk blouse. Amethyst is not my birthstone, and I would never allow anyone to tell me what to wear or not wear. I collect stones, and one of my favorites is opal, which is ALSO not my birthstone. I even wear my great-aunt's pale yellow topaz cocktail ring from time to time (sadly it is slightly chipped). Life is so very short. One should wear things you like. Other people's opinions cannot be allowed to fence you in.
I don't usually combine statement necklaces with scarves, but I have a friend who does regularly and it looks great on her. She wears the scarf draped along the open edges of a jacket or cardigan. – nancyo
I'm delighted to hear this concern about age and birthstones is an uncommon issue. One reader was particularly worried because someone had told her that "wearing your birthstone is like believe your horoscope…" I consider that particularly unkind, inappropriate, and just plain mean. Poor unhappy woman, eh?
hugs all around,
Janice
p.s. – no new Vivienne Files tomorrow – we've got illness in the house and it's taking all of my time. I know you understand.
Janice,
We've been healing first from a respiratory bug, and now a lower intestinal bug has taken up residence in my hubby. Healing thoughts are on their way to you and yours ! Take all of the time you need to get much better or to tend to your hubby .
Janice – I love seeing the birthstone jewelry. I've always had a bit of fun wearing mine. Could I ask that you publish your birthstone columns before the actual month to allow us time to order a birthstone gift if we are so inclined. I always enjoy your posts. Lois K
Reminds me of an incident with a new coworker that is sort of the opposite of this. I was wearing an amethyst necklace that was sort of showy and he spotted it. He then loudly announced "Amethyst! You were born in February." He was a bit disgruntled when I had to tell him no, the necklace just looked good with that sweater. I'd need at least 10 birthdays if my jewelry box had to match my birthdate.
Never knew about birthstones until I moved to this country, and I never gave them much thought regarding relation to age after that. I did look up mine (citrine), and am looking forward to the November installment. For what it's worth, I do think that navy and purple look stunning.
I love wearing scarves and I love wearing necklaces but I have never considered wearing them simultaneously. Doesn't the scarf cover the necklace? I would love to see an example or read an explanation! This could revolutionize my wardrobe!
I often wear a scarf and necklace. I tend to use a square scarf such as the Hermes ones, which I fold into a long sausage and knot just above the breast bone. There are so many ways to knot them that expose the neck and necklace and the best blog for instructions is Mai Tai's Picture book blog.
Oh, love this post! Please do sapphire next… star sapphires even…
I am also June and wear pearls most days, but I have also inherited the most lovely amethyst necklace from my great aunt. Unfortunately it needs repair as the silver links are too fragile and I miss it dreadfully as amethyst as a colour such as the accessories that you have included is one of my favourite colours. If I see it, I tend to buy it. It is wonderful with grey and if you can find chocolate brown it really sings. What a lovely idea for a clothes series. Thank you.
Thank you so much for including Lafonn jewelry in your story! February babies are certainly lucky to have such a lovely birthstone. With such beautiful gemstones and talented designers available, one is never too old to wear beautiful birthstone jewelry. – Lauren from the Lafonn PR & Marketing Team
I am about to have a February granddaughter – great post! Almost 40 years ago my husband chose an engagement ring with both of our birthstones, Diamond and Ruby. I have always loved it! Now my younger daughter's husband designed an engagement ring with both her and her husband's stones, Amethyst and Peridot. I sense the start of a great family tradition! Great ideas for how to use the jewelry as inspiration.
Here's hoping that you double back and do garnets for us January babes!
This is quite a timely post, Janice. Yesterday, the 6th, was my birthday and, yes, I wear and love amethyst jewelry. In fact, I have a large amethyst ring set in silver that I wear every day and a smaller amethyst in the shape of a heart, encircled by diamonds, in a gold setting that I wear on special occasions.
When I was a little girl, I had a lavender bedroom that I loved.
I wear purple with brown, khaki, olive green and navy blue. It's far more versatile than people think.
Cheers, M-T
P.S.: Hope health problems are soon behind you.
I've also never heard it was childish to wear your birthstone. My birthday is in June and I always wear pearls, but I guess I don't even think of them as my birthstone; I just like them. Thanks for showing so many ways to wear amethyst. It really does go so well with so many colors. xo
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